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作者︰shyungchongzeng 來(lai)源(yuan)︰文章閱讀網 時間︰2020-04-04 22:24 閱讀︰

 Dear Daughter:
親愛(ai)的女(nv)兒
  As we drove off from Columbia, I wanted to write a letter to you to tell you all that is on my mind.

當我們qiang) 凳shi)出哥倫比(bi)亞大學的時候(hou),我想(xiang)寫一封信給你(ni),告(gao)訴你(ni)盤旋(xuan)在我腦(nao)中的想(xiang)法。

  First, I want to tell you how proud we are. Getting into Columbia is a real testament of what a great well-rounded student you are. Your academic, artistic, and social skills have truly blossomed in the last few years. Whether it is getting the highest grade in Calculus, completing your elegant fashion design, successfully selling your painted running shoes, or becoming one of the top orators in Model United Nations, you have become a talented and accomplished young woman. You should be as proud of yourself as we are.

首(shou)先,我想(xiang)告(gao)訴你(ni)我們為你(ni)感到特別(bie)驕傲。進入(ru)哥倫比(bi)亞大學證(zheng)明你(ni)是一個(ge)全面發(fa)展的優秀學生,你(ni)的學業、藝術和社交技(ji)能最近(jin)都(du)有卓(zhuo)越的表現,無論(lun)是你(ni)在微積分上得了(liao)最高分,完成自己(ji)典雅(ya)的時尚的設計(ji),成功賣出繪制(zhi)的跑鞋,還gu)竊 澳D飭 he)國”演(yan)說中成為表現最突(tu)出的人之一,你(ni)毫(hao)無疑問已經是一個(ge)多才多藝的女(nv)孩。你(ni)的父母為你(ni)感到驕傲,你(ni)也應該(gai)像我們一樣為自己(ji)感到自豪。

  I will always remember the first moment I held you in my arms. I felt a tingling sensation that directly touched my heart. It was an intoxicating feeling I will always have. It must be that "father-daughter connection" which will bind us for life. I will always remember singing you lullaby while I rocked you to sleep. When I put you down, it was always with both relief (she finally fell asleep!) and regret (wishing I could hold you longer). And I will always remember taking you to the playground, and watching you having so much fun. You were so cute and adorable, and that is why everybody loved you so.

我會永遠du)塹玫諞淮ci)將你(ni)抱在臂(bi)彎的na)且豢蹋 恢中孿始ji)動的感覺(jue)瞬間觸動了(liao)我的心,那是一種永遠讓我陶醉的感覺(jue),就是那種將我們的一生都(du)聯結在一起的“父女(nv)情結”。我也常常想(xiang)起我唱著催眠(mian)曲輕搖你(ni)入(ru)睡(shui),當我把你(ni)放下(xia)的時候(hou),常常覺(jue)得既解脫又惋惜,一方面我想(xiang),她終(zhong)于睡(shui)著了(liao)!另一方面,我又多麼希望自己(ji)可以多抱你(ni)一會兒。我還記得帶你(ni)到運動場(chang),看著你(ni)玩得那麼開心,你(ni)是那樣可愛(ai),所有人都(du)非常愛(ai)你(ni)。

  You have been a great kid ever since you were born, always quiet, empathetic, attentive, and well-mannered. You were three when we built our house. I remember you quietly followed us every weekend for more than ten hours a day to get building supplies. You put up with that boring period without a fuss, happily ate hamburgers every meal in the car, sang with Barney until you fell asleep. When you went to Sunday Chinese school, you studied hard even though it was no fun for you. I cannot believe how lucky we are as parents to have a daughter like you.

你(ni)不但長得可愛(ai),而且是個(ge)特別(bie)乖巧(qiao)的孩子。你(ni)從不吵鬧、為人著想(xiang),既听話又有xin)衩mao)。當你(ni)三歲我們建房子的時候(hou),每個(ge)周末(mo)十多個(ge)小時你(ni)都(du)靜靜地跟著我們去運建築材料,三餐在車上吃著漢堡,唱著兒歌,唱累(lei)了(liao)si)退shui)覺(jue),一點都(du)不嬌氣(qi)不抱怨(yuan)。你(ni)去上周日(ri)的中文學習班時,盡(jin)管一點也不覺(jue)得有趣,卻(que)依然很努(nu)力。我們做(zuo)父母的na)苡邢衲ni)這樣的女(nv)兒真的感到非常幸運

  You have been an excellent elder sister. Even though you two had your share of fights, the last few years you have become best friends. Your sister loves you so much, and she loves to make you laugh. She looks up to you, and sees you as her role model. As you saw when we departed, she misses you so much. And I know that you miss her just as much. There is nothing like family, and other than your parents, your sister is the one person who you can trust and confide in. She will be the one to take care of you, and the one you must take care of. There is nothing we wish more than that your sisterhood will continue to bond as you grow older, and that you will take care of each other throughout your lives. For the next four years, do have a short video chat with her every few days, and do email her when you have a chance.

你(ni)也是個(ge)很好的姐姐。雖然你(ni)們姐妹以前也會打(da)架,但是長大後,你(ni)們真的成為了(liao)好朋友妹妹很愛(ai)你(ni),很喜歡逗你(ni)笑,她把你(ni)當成她的榜樣看待(dai)。我們qiang) A href="http://www.duwenzhang.com/huati/likai/index1.html">離開哥大後,她非常想(xiang)你(ni),我知道(dao)你(ni)也很想(xiang)她。世界(jie)上最寶貴的就是家人。和父母一樣,妹妹就是你(ni)最可以信任的人。隨(sui)著年(nian)齡的nao)齔? ni)們姐妹之間的情誼(yi)不變,你(ni)們互相照應,彼此(ci)關心,這就是我最希望見到的事情了(liao)。在你(ni)的大學四na)輳 鋅帳蹦ni)一定要常常跟妹妹視頻(pin)聊聊天,寫寫電子郵件。

  College will be the most important years in your life. It is in college that you will truly discover what learning is about. You often question "what good is this course". I encourage you to be inquisitive, but I also want to tell you: "Education is what you have left after all that is taught is forgotten." What I mean by that is the materials taught isn't as important as you gaining the ability to learn a new subject, and the ability to analyze a new problem. That is really what learning in college is about this will be the period where you go from teacher-taught to master-inspired, after which you must become self-learner. So do take each subject seriously, and even if what you learn isn't critical for your life, the skills of learning will be something you cherish forever.

大學將是你(ni)人生最重要的時光,在大學里你(ni)會發(fa)現學習的真諦。你(ni)以前經常會問到 “這個(ge)課程有什麼用”,這是個(ge)好問題,但是我希望你(ni)理解︰“教育的真諦就是當你(ni)忘記一切xing)?降畝 髦 笏Oxia)的東西。”我的意(yi)思是,最重要的不是你(ni)學到的具體的知識,而是你(ni)學習新事物和解決(jue)新問題的na)芰ΑU獠攀譴笱  暗惱嬲yi)義(yi)——這將是你(ni)從被動學習轉向(xiang)自主學習的階段,之後你(ni)會變成一個(ge)很好的自學者。所以,即便(bian)你(ni)所學的不是生活里所急需的,也要認真看待(dai)大學里的每一門功課,就算學習的技(ji)能你(ni)會忘記,學習的na)芰κ悄ni)將受用終(zhong)身的。

  Do not fall into the trap of dogma. There is no single simple answer to any question. Remember during your high school debate class, I always asked you to take on the side that you don't believe in? I did that for a reason -- things rarely "black and white", and there are always many ways to look at a problem. You will become a better problem solver if you recognized that. This is called "critical thinking", and it is the most important thinking skill you need for your life. This also means you need to become tolerant and supportive of others. I will always remember when I went to my Ph.D. advisor and proposed a new thesis topic. He said "I don't agree with you, but I'll support you." After the years, I have learned this isn't just flexibility, it is encouragement of critical thinking, and an empowering style of leadership, and it has become a part of me. I hope it will become a part of you too.

不要被教條所束縛,任何問題都(du)沒有一個(ge)唯一的簡單的答案。還記得當我幫助(zhu)你(ni)高中的辯論(lun)課程時,我總是讓你(ni)站在你(ni)不認可的na)且環嚼lai)辯論(lun)嗎(ma)?我這麼做(zuo)的理由(you)就是希望你(ni)能夠(gou)理解︰看待(dai)一個(ge)問題不應該(gai)非黑即白,而是有很多方法和角度。當你(ni)意(yi)識到這點的時候(hou),你(ni)就tu)岢晌 桓ge)很好的解決(jue)問題者。這就是“批判的思維(wei)”——你(ni)的一生都(du)會需要的最重要的思考方式(shi),這也意(yi)味(wei)著你(ni)還需要包容和支(zhi)持不同于你(ni)的其他(ta)觀點。我永遠du)塹夢胰?zhao)我的博士導師提出了(liao)一個(ge)新論(lun)題,他(ta)告(gao)訴我︰“我不同意(yi)你(ni),但我支(zhi)持你(ni)。”多年(nian)後,我認識到這不僅僅是包容,而是一種批判式(shi)思考,更是令人折服的領導風格,現在這也變成了(liao)我的一部分。我希望這也能成為你(ni)的一部分。

  Follow your passion in college. Take courses you think you will enjoy. Don't be trapped in what others think or say. Steve Jobs says when you are in college, your passion will create many dots, and later in your life you will connect them. In his great speech given at Stanford commencement, he gave the great example where he took calligraphy, and a decade later, it became the basis of the beautiful Macintosh fonts, which later ignited desktop publishing, and brought wonderful tools like Microsoft Word to our lives. His expedition into calligraphy was a dot, and the Macintosh became the connecting line. So don't worry too much about what job you will have, and don't be too utilitarian, and if you like Japanese or Korean, go for it, even if your dad thinks "it's not useful" : ) Enjoy picking your dots, and be assured one day you will find your calling, and connect a beautiful curve through the dots.

在大學里你(ni)要追隨(sui)自己(ji)的激(ji)情和興(xing)趣,選(xuan)你(ni)感興(xing)趣的課程,不要困擾于別(bie)人怎(zen)麼ci)禱蛟zen)麼想(xiang)。史蒂夫•喬布斯曾經說過(guo),在大學里你(ni)的熱情會創造(zao)出很多點,在你(ni)隨(sui)後的生命中你(ni)會把這些點串聯起來(lai)。在他(ta)著名(ming)的斯坦福畢業典禮(li)演(yan)講中,他(ta)舉了(liao)一個(ge)很好的例(li)子︰他(ta)在大學里修了(liao)看ci)坪hao)無用處的書(shu)法,而十年(nian)後,這成了(liao)隻果(guo)Macintosh里漂(piao)亮字庫的基礎,而因為Macintosh有這麼好的字庫,才帶來(lai)了(liao)桌面出版和今天的辦(ban)公軟件(例(li)如微軟Office)。他(ta)對書(shu)法的探(tan)索就是一個(ge)點,而隻果(guo)Macintosh把多個(ge)點聯結成了(liao)一條線。所以不要太擔心將來(lai)你(ni)要做(zuo)什麼樣的工作,也不要太急功近(jin)利。假如你(ni)喜歡日(ri)語(yu)或韓語(yu),就去學吧,即使(shi)你(ni)爸爸曾認為那沒什麼用︰)盡(jin)興(xing)地選(xuan)擇你(ni)的點吧,要有信念有一天機(ji)緣dao)戳偈保 ni)會找(zhao)到自己(ji)的人生使(shi)命,畫(hua)出一條美麗的曲線。

  Do your best in classes, but don't let pressure get to you. Your mother and I have no expectations for your grades. If you graduate and learn something in your four years, we would feel happy. Your Columbia degree will take you far, even if you don't graduate with honors. So please don't give yourself pressure. During your last few months in high school, you were so happy because there was little pressure and college applications are finished. But in the past few weeks, we saw you are beginning to worry (did you know you bite your nails when you are nervous?). Please don't be worried. The only thing that matters is that you learned. The only metric you should use is that you tried. Grades are just silly letters that give the vain people something to brag, and the lazy people something to fear. You are too good to be either.

在功課上要盡(jin)力,但不要給自己(ji)太多壓力。你(ni)媽媽和我在成績上對你(ni)沒什麼要求,只(zhi)要你(ni)能順利畢業並在這四na)昀鋂?攪liao)些東西,我們就tu)岷芨 xing)了(liao)。即便(bian)你(ni)畢業時沒有獲得優異的成績,你(ni)的哥倫比(bi)亞學位也將帶你(ni)走(zou)得很遠。所以別(bie)給自己(ji)壓力。在你(ni)高中生活的最後幾(ji)個(ge)月(yue),因為壓力比(bi)較小,大學申(shen)請也結束了(liao),你(ni)過(guo)得很開心,但是在最近(jin)的幾(ji)個(ge)星期,你(ni)好像開始緊張(zhang)起來(lai)。(你(ni)注意(yi)到你(ni)緊張(zhang)時會咬指甲嗎(ma)?)千萬(wan)別(bie)擔心,最重要的是你(ni)在學習,你(ni)需要的唯一衡量(liang)是你(ni)的努(nu)力程度。成績只(zhi)不過(guo)是虛榮(rong)的人用以yuan)敵旰豌祭lan)的人所恐(kong)懼的無聊數字而已,而你(ni)既不虛榮(rong)也不慵懶(lan)。

  Most importantly, make friends and be happy. College friends are often the best in life, because during college you are closer to them physically than to your family. Also, going through independence and adulthood is a natural bonding experience. Pick a few friends and become really close to them pick the ones who are genuine and sincere to you. Don't worry about their hobbies, grades, looks, or even personalities. You have developed some real friendships in high school in your last two years, so trust your instinct, and make new friends. You are a genuine and sincere person anyone would enjoy being your friend, so be confident, outgoing, and pro-active. If you think you like someone, tell her. You have very little to lose. Give people the benefit of the doubt; don't stereotype and be forgiving. People are not perfect, so as long as they are genuine and sincere, trust them and be good to them. They will give back. This is my secret of success that I am genuine with people and trust them (unless they do something to lose my trust). Some people tell me that occasionally I would be taken advantage of. They are right, but I can tell you that that loss is nothing compared to what I gained. In my last 18 years leading people, I have realized that only one thing matters to gain the trust and respect of others, and to do so, you need to trust and respect others first. Whether it is for management, work, or friendship, this is something you should ponder.

最重要的是在大學里你(ni)要交一些朋友,快樂生活。大學的朋友往往是qiao)凶詈玫吶笥眩 蛭 詿笱?錟ni)和朋友能夠(gou)近(jin)距離交往。另外,在一塊兒成長,一起獨lan)li),很自然地你(ni)們就tu)嶠艚艫叵翟諞黃穡 晌 苡選(xuan)Dni)應該(gai)挑選(xuan)一些真誠(cheng)誠(cheng)懇的朋友,跟他(ta)們親近(jin),別(bie)在乎(hu)他(ta)們的愛(ai)好、成績、外表甚至性格。你(ni)在高中的最後兩年(nian)已經交到了(liao)一些真正的朋友,所以盡(jin)可以相信自己(ji)的直ben)  俳灰恍┬屢笥尋傘Dni)是一個(ge)真誠(cheng)的人,任何人都(du)會喜歡跟你(ni)做(zuo)朋友的,所以要自信、外向(xiang)、主動一點,如果(guo)你(ni)喜歡某人,就告(gao)訴她,就算她拒絕(jue)了(liao),你(ni)也沒有xing)鶚 裁礎R宰畬蟺納埔yi)去對人,不要有成見,要寬容。人無完人,只(zhi)要他(ta)們很真誠(cheng),就信任他(ta)們,對他(ta)們友善。他(ta)們將給你(ni)相同的回報,這是我成功的秘(mi)密——我以誠(cheng)待(dai)人,信任他(ta)人(除非他(ta)們做(zuo)了(liao)失信于我的事)。有人告(gao)訴這樣有時我會被佔(zhan)便(bian)宜,他(ta)們是對的,但是我可以告(gao)訴你(ni)︰以誠(cheng)待(dai)人讓我得到的nao)對凍chao)過(guo)我失去的。在我做(zuo)管理的18年(nian)里,我學到一件很重要的事——要想(xiang)得到他(ta)人的信任和尊重,只(zhi)有先去信任和尊重他(ta)人。無論(lun)是管理、工作、交友,這點都(du)值得你(ni)參考。

  Do keep your high school friends, and stay connected to them, but do not use them as substitutes for college friendship, and do not spend too much time with them, because that would eat into your time to make new friends.

要和你(ni)高中時代(dai)的朋友保持聯系,但是不要用他(ta)們來(lai)取代(dai)大學的友誼(yi),也不要把全部的時間都(du)花在老(lao)朋友身上,因為那樣你(ni)就tu)  ?恍屢笥訓幕ji)會了(liao)。

  Start planning for your summers early what would you like to do? Where would you like to live? What would you like to learn? What have you learned in college that might change your mind? I think your plan of studying fashion is good, and you should decide where you want to be, and get into the right courses. We of course hope you come back to Beijing, but you should go where you think is best for you.

你(ni)還要早點開始規劃你(ni)的暑假——你(ni)想(xiang)做(zuo)什麼?你(ni)想(xiang)呆在哪(na)兒?你(ni)想(xiang)學點什麼?你(ni)在大學里學習是否會讓你(ni)有新的打(da)算?我覺(jue)得你(ni)學習藝術設計(ji)的計(ji)劃很不錯,你(ni)應該(gai)想(xiang)好你(ni)該(gai)去哪(na)兒學習相應的課程。我們當bi)幌Mni)回到北(bei)ben)   親鈧zhong)的決(jue)定是你(ni)的。

  Whether it is summer-planning, or coursework planning, or picking a major, or managing your time, you should take control of your life. In the past, I have helped you quite a bit, whether it is in college application, designing your extracurricular activities, or picking the initial coursework. I will always be there for you, but the time has come for you to be in the driver's seat this is your life, and you need to be in control. I will always remember the exhilarating feeling in my life that I got to decide to skip kindergarten, that I got to decide to change to computer science major, that I got to decide to leave academia for Apple, that I got to decide to go to China, that I got to decide to go to Google, and most recently, that I got to decide to start my own business. Being able to decide means you get to live the life that you want to. Life is too short to live the life others do or others want you. Being in control feels great. Try it, and you'll love it!

不管是暑假計(ji)劃,功課規劃,抑zhi)蚴茄xuan)專業,管理時間,你(ni)都(du)應該(gai)負責你(ni)的人生。過(guo)去不管是qiao)shen)請學校、設計(ji)課外活動或者選(xuan)擇最初的課程,我都(du)從旁(pang)幫助(zhu)了(liao)你(ni)不少(shao)。以後,我仍然會一直站你(ni)身旁(pang),但是現在是你(ni)自己(ji)掌舵的時候(hou)了(liao)。我常常記起我生命中那些令人振奮的時刻——在幼(you)兒園決(jue)定跳級,決(jue)定轉到計(ji)算機(ji)科學專業,決(jue)定離開學術界(jie)選(xuan)擇Apple,決(jue)定回中國,決(jue)定選(xuan)擇Google,乃至最近(jin)選(xuan)擇創辦(ban)我的新公司(si)。有能力進行選(xuan)擇意(yi)味(wei)著你(ni)會過(guo)上自己(ji)he)xiang)要的生活。生命太短暫(zan)了(liao),你(ni)不能過(guo)別(bie)人想(xiang)要你(ni)過(guo)的生活。掌控自己(ji)的生命是很棒的感覺(jue),試試吧,你(ni)會愛(ai)上它的!

  I told your mom I'm writing this letter, and asked what she wanted me to say. She thought and said: "just ask her to take care of herself." Simple but deeply caring that is how your mother is, and that is why you love her so much. In this simple sentence is her hope that you will become independent in the way you take care of yourself that you will remember to take your medicine, that you will get enough sleep, that you will have a balanced diet, that you will get some exercise, and that you will go see a doctor whenever you don't feel good. An ancient Chinese proverb says that the most important thing to be nice to your parents is to take care of yourself. This is because your parents love you so much, and that if you are well, they will have comfort. You will understand this one day when you become a mother. But in the meantime, please listen to your mother and take care of yourself.

我告(gao)訴你(ni)媽媽我在寫這封信,問她有什麼想(xiang)對你(ni)說的,她想(xiang)了(liao)想(xiang),說“讓她好好照顧自己(ji)”,很簡單卻(que)飽含著真切的關心——這一向(xiang)是你(ni)深愛(ai)的媽媽的特點。這短短的一句話,是她想(xiang)提醒你(ni)很多事情,比(bi)如要記得自己(ji)按時吃藥,好好睡(shui)覺(jue),保持健康的飲(yin)食,適量(liang)運動,不舒(shu)服的時候(hou)要去看醫生等等。中國有句古(gu)語(yu),說“身體發(fa)膚,受之父母,不敢毀傷,孝之始也”。這句話的意(yi)思用比(bi)較新的方法詮gu)途褪撬擔焊改缸畎ai)的就是你(ni),所以照顧好自己(ji)就是孝順最好的方法。當你(ni)成為母親的na)翹歟 ni)就tu)嶗斫庹廡 T諛翹  埃 杪璧模 ni)一定要好好照顧自己(ji)。

  College is the four years where you have:

  •the greatest amount of free time

大學是你(ni)自由(you)時間最多的四na)輟

  •the first chance to be independent

大學是你(ni)第一次(ci)學會獨lan)li)的四na)輟

  •the most flexibility to change

大學是qiang)傷芐宰釙qiang)的四na)輟

  •the lowest risk for making mistakes

大學是犯(fan)錯代(dai)價最低的四na)輟

  So please treasure your college years make the best of your free time, become an independent thinker in control of your destiny, evolve yourself into a bi-cultural talent, be bold to experiment, learn and grow through your successes and challenges.

所以,珍惜你(ni)的大學時光吧,好好利用你(ni)的空閑時間,成為掌握自己(ji)命運的獨lan)li)思考者,發(fa)展自己(ji)的多元化才能,大膽地去嘗試,通過(guo)不斷的成功和挑戰來(lai)學習和成長,成為融匯中西的人才。

  When I faced the greatest challenge and opportunity in my life in 2005, you gave me a big hug and said "bonne chance", which means "good luck" and "good courage". Now I do the same for you. Bonne chance, my angel and princess. May Columbia become the happiest four years in your life, and may you blossom into just what you dream to be.

當我在2005年(nian)面對人生最大的挑戰時,你(ni)給了(liao)我大大的擁抱,還跟我說了(liao)一句法語(yu)“bonne chance”。這句話代(dai)表“祝你(ni)勇敢,祝你(ni)好運!”現在,我也想(xiang)跟你(ni)說同樣的話,bonne chance,我的天使(shi)和公主,希望哥倫比(bi)亞成為你(ni)一生中最快樂的四na)輳 Mni)成為你(ni)夢想(xiang)成為的人!

      Love,
      愛(ai)你(ni)的,

      Dad (& Mom)

      爸爸(和媽媽)


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